I have a brilliant idea.
Everyone has a time in their life when they just want to beat someone’s ass - anyone’s ass. But most of us never do so because we are decent people and we find other ways to release (or numb) our rage and frustration, such as drinking, smoking, going for a jog, or whatever.
Yet the fact remains that sometimes? You just want to beat someone’s ass. Preferably someone who deserves it, because then you wouldn’t have to feel guilty or as if you’ve done something wrong. With me so far?
I believe I have struck upon the perfect solution to this psychological need in our society. My plan would conveniently also free up jail space and other taxpayer-funded methods of punishing certain scumbags. I feel confident that after viewing the following video, you will be 100% behind the plan I will explain below.
[WARNING: There is no blood or gore, but this video is rough to watch unless you're a coldhearted baby-hater. I didn't have a warning at first but so many commenters wished I had, so here it is now. It shows a baby being flung across a room violently, landing, and crying his little heart out, while two teenage boys laugh. I'm telling you, it will make you want to kill the teenagers. But don't watch if seeing this baby terrified and hurt like that will ruin your day like it did many of ours.]
As this article explains, the sociopathic-little-shit teenage boy in that video will be handled in juvenile court and may do some…detention time. His buddy who filmed it hasn’t been charged with anything at all.
So here is my idea: you take people like that - the teenage bottomfeeder who may not deserve longterm prison time but definitely needs a serious ass-beating - and you put them in a special detention center. We’ll call it The Needs-An-Ass-Beating Correctional Facility. You fund it by charging a small fee - as low as $10 - to any citizen who shows up with an urge to beat some ass in a justifiable fashion. After paying the fee, the citizen is escorted to a room where he or she will be left alone with whichever shithead he or she particularly wants to beat, and is given one hour to have at it.
Shithead-neutralization measures would be in place, of course. For example, I couldn’t successfully beat this kid’s ass unless his hands were tied, so his hands would be tied. Depending on the egregiousness of the scumbag’s offense, weapons may or may not be allowed. Say you have a shit-for-brains in the facility who verbally abused and shoved an elderly person on the street for no reason; you may have a billyclub with which to beat his particular ass. And so on and so forth.
I really think it’s a great idea. It would help everybody. People like you and me would be actively participating in the judicial system, and losers like these teenage boys would get what they deserve and might just learn the lessons they need to learn, such as it’s not fun to be a scumbag because being a scumbag means you get your ass beaten. And taxpayers are relieved of some burden - everything runs more efficiently when you apply capitalism.
Who’s with me on this? I don’t know about you but I would gladly pay upwards of a hundred bucks to have an hour alone with that fucker in the video, to articulately and thoughtfully educate him on the pros and cons of treating 8-month-old babies like he did. Imagine, under my plan, the lessons you could teach much more serious child abusers.
Elect me world leader. Do it.
Oh. My. God.
I am actually crying listening to that baby.
If this is the kind of shit that happens and gets taped, imagine what these assclowns are doing that they are too afraid to tape? I am so glad I was able to stay home and raise mine up to the point that they could actually verbalize the phrase “that fucker fucked with me mommy so please get a fucking cane and fuck him up” instead of that horrible keening sobbing that poor little thing is making.
Edit:
I just showed this to the ladies in my office, and they say the pinata-whacking line forms behind them. Louisville Sluggers will be distributed gratis.
Personally, I say this calls for Judge Dredd-style justice. I will vote for you, work for your campaign, donate funds, kiss other pols asses, etc. if you promise to implement this strategy …
July 3rd, 2008 at 12:43 pmESTHmmm. Well, obviously I am not you, but I’m confident that I could kill this twerp, and many others like him, bare handed. So your plan might need a bit more thought.
Even if it’s a rule: “Steve specifically exempted from civic ass kicking duties.”
July 3rd, 2008 at 12:47 pmESTToo many possible bad scenarios for your setup, I think. Try this one on for size:
Twerp is bent slightly over a bar about waist high, hands manacled to the wall/a post/whatever, feet manacled, spread about three feet apart. He wears a cup, shorts, and a face,neck guard. You get 30 minutes to whack him with a flogger (about 20-30 leather strips attached to a convenient handle).
This has most, if not all, the benefits of beating the crap out of him, but no long-term physical damage, because the sheer number of strips prevents deep cuts. After he’s been dragged kicking and screaming into the room and strapped down like that for about a month, he won’t ever want to get in trouble again (Sort of like that kid that got caned in Singapore).
July 3rd, 2008 at 12:56 pmESTRachel, you need to post an alert for stuff like this. I can hardly see for the red curtain of blood in front of my eyes right now.
I agree with Steve, killing this waste and Cecil B. DeMille there with my bare hands is near the top of my list, but using whatever other objects are at hand is so much more satisfying, and creative.
There are obvious ways to take these shits out with, well, this laptop, the telephone, the coffee cup, or this pen here.
But, to do it without touching their little heads, that is art. Also, keeping them alive for 2-3 days, so they can truly appreciate the error of their ways, without breaking a sweat yourself, well, that’s the work of a master.
Or you could just give them headache #9mm and be done with it.
Either way, they can’t be dead enough.
July 3rd, 2008 at 12:58 pmESTI think community justice would be a fine idea. Let everyone in this punk’s neighborhood line up to give him a squirt with a high-power Taser gun. After filling him with countless volts, he will plead for sweet death - only then can you be assured he will not torture another baby again.
The only problem that I see is that sending the wrong man to jail or to juvenile hall is a tragedy.
Beating a wrongly accused man is criminal and every bit as bad as the heinous act that provoked it.
Since you want to have Clint Eastwood’s progeny; I suggest you watch an old Eastwood film called Hang’em High. The comments I have seen so far make me recall the film and the message that vigilanty justice often overlooks any due process at all and is often just an excuse to go postal on the nearest guilty-looking guy.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:00 pmESTI would not be able to join your cause because I wouldn’t be able to stop after an hour of kickin the bejeebus out of this kid.
Then, I’d want to kick his parents’ asses as well.
fyi
Ed
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:01 pmESTHow many times did they do this before they thought to get a video camera.
If anyone did this to my child, they’d be lucky to get into the hands of the police.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:06 pmESTLike Steve pointed out, there are a lot of people out there that could (even unintentionally) kill a guy with their bare hands.
To avoid the bureaucracy of a massive oversight organization lets simplify things. Go back and learn from our forefathers. Then we can throw a bone to liberal friends and use some international guidance also:
We need a set of stocks in the town square, a basket full of bamboo canes and a single operator who will collect $5 for each swing you want to take.
Rules are simple:
- you can buy only three swings at a time, then you have to go to the back of the line.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:10 pmEST- If the POS in the stocks passes out, you can’t hit them again until they regain consciousness.
- Any part of the body visible from the back of the stocks is a fair target.
- 50% of all proceeds go to the aggrieved party as reparations.
- The rest covers operating expenses.
- If you break the cane you get to keep it as a souvenir.
I’m torn between wanting to vomit and wanting to beat them. I guess both can be done…
Who the hell could possibly think that was a good idea?!
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:12 pmESTCaning’s a great idea, I think.
Repeat offenders get beaten twice as much as first-time offenders. For each offense, you get beaten double the amount you did the previous time. If you die, too bad, you shouldn’t have been a total fucktard asshole.
Actually, now that I think about it, I would totally support putting that kid in the video, with his limbs tied, on the edge of a giant inflated pillow-thing, then dropping a heavy weight on the other side to make him fly off…onto a concrete platform.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:20 pmESTThat’s exactly what I thought.
Butthead: “heh. look what this pillow does to your brother when I hop on it like this.”
Beavis: “heh. Heh. Yeah. Do it again!”
20 minutes later…
Butthead: “Dude you should totally get the camera for this. Let’s see if we can make it to ten feet away.”
I don’t mean to make light of this, if it came across that way. It is truly disgusting. Count me in for some beat-down action.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:23 pmESTwe need human size vegematics for the pukes, that way we could slice and dice em. i;d like to first in line
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:24 pmESTRachel, That’s an AWESOME idea! I just got so mad when I saw that video. (Shit, and I have to go to Lowes now to return a defective pump, I hope they don’t give me any shit about the exchange) I like Davids idea too, although I think 50 cents a swing is more like it. Little BARBARIANS!!
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:32 pmESTHave we officially unshot the YouTube messenger, or was this an exception?
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:33 pmESTRachel, we just need to bring back a stocks in the public square-local park or where ever.
When a lil shit is busted shoplifting. Toss his ass in the stocks for a few hours. Someone robs someone put him in for 2 days.
A guy hits his wife, put him in for a week.
Guy rapes a woman, remove his pants and issue cattle prods or large splintery sticks.
Think of the money it could raise. You get 3 rocks for $100, 3 pieces of rotten fruit for the lessor offenders. Violent crimes get rocks, non violent property crimes get fruit.
This would also free up so much prison space it aint funny. Get busted for drugs do 2 days. Stop drugs from being “fun” would go a long way into curbing the drug problem in the country. And when I say drugs I don’t mean pot.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:33 pmESToops didn’t read the comments before I posted!
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:35 pmESTDavid and I are thinking alike!!
While I’m all for beating the shit out of anyone who deserves it (BTW, I can’t watch the video, as I’m not allowed streaming media at work), I want to point out one thing: as much as anyone deserves it, will beating them teach them accountability? It’s the one thing in common I see with everyone who perpetuates a crime like this. I call it the “yeah, BUT” syndrome.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:35 pmESTHeck, I’d spend $100 per hour for that kind of privilege to beat their butts.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:37 pmESTIt’s the modern version of the public stockade. If we actually had town squares anymore, you could move the kid out of the jail and set up a little podium to put him and the beaters on display. Good for selling more tickets.
Maybe at the mall…
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:45 pmESTThat is…I…he…and they just…WHAT?!
*slow deep breaths*
Okay, the article says that the piss-stain who actually launched the baby is facing time and the judge will take it seriously. Fine. Good enough for me.
HOWEVER, the article ALSO says that the co-piss-stain who filmed this happening is not being charged?!
WTF?!
Depraved indifference? Criminal negligence? Negligent endangerment of a child?
Do ANY of those ring any bells?!
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:52 pmESTAs much fun as my preferred method of disposing those to jackasses would be (slaughtering them like a couple of innocent little aminals in the factory farm ad on the sidebar), that would probably be un-Christian, and ever so slightly illegal. So, I’d stick with a solid beating to within an inch of their miserable lives, for whatever price I’m required to pay.
As many others have said, if that happened to my baby, those guys would never see the inside of a police station.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:52 pmESTwill beating them teach them accountability?
If they learn accountability, then that’s a bonus. But it’s not the point. The point is that justice gets done.
“But what is justice?” asks the educated liberal.
“You’ll know it when you feel it” I respond.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:57 pmESTPillory the both of them. Then distribute rotten tomatoes, chunks of dung, sharp rocks, bricks, and anything else you might like to the waiting mob. Let the mob practice their pitching. Finish up with tar and feathers. Then tattoo them with a scarlet B for baby basher, and sterilize them so they can never breed.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:58 pmESTI have a five month old boy. Just seeing that turns on all of the protective instincts, a great many of which involve a Louisville Slugger or a .357 magnum.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:59 pmESTI’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The punishment for this type of act should be exactly the same as the act itself.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:02 pmESTIn this case:
a. get one of those giant inflatable bags that the movie stunt men fall onto
b. place the oxygen pirate offender on one side of bag
c. hoist large object over other side, maybe a Mack truck
d. drop truck
e. listen for satisfying THUD in the distance
f. repeat as necessary.
I can’t believe you people! Where’s the compassion?
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:08 pmESTYou folks sound like you’d make a fine seething Muslim mob. Have any of you ever been teenage boys, or God Forbid, have one of your own? They do and say incredibly stupid things with regularity.
Having said that, I think the experience of the court system will scare the hell out of them and teach them a lesson they won’t forget. Maybe juvie, or a real jail cell would do even more. I have found through laborious experience with my son that discipline calls for extreme creativity. There are times that I would like to send him to Parris Island, SC and let a man-eating DI get ahold of him, just once.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:10 pmEST“They do and say incredibly stupid things with regularity.”
Hence, they should be beaten within inches from death with regularity.
“Having said that, I think the experience of the court system will scare the hell out of them and teach them a lesson they won’t forget.”
Scaring will not work unless there is a real danger to fear. Danger, which actually happens to people.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:12 pmESTWe have a term in the military called “Wall to Wall Counseling”. It’s where we stick shitheads in a room and beat the shit out of their heads until we get tired, then bring in the next senior NCO to continue until the problem goes away. We even have a regulation on how to do it properly. With some simple adjustments, we could get this passed thru Congress and make it the proper way to handle shitheads in the future.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:13 pmESTPersonally, I think this is a fabulous idea.
Can we start with Congress and sort of go from there?
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:15 pmESTI doubt YOU got beaten within inches of death yourself with regularity, Markku. I also imagine you did stupid things just as did I, although maybe not as hurtful to anyone, except occasional holes and dents in my own person. “Let him among you who is without sin cast the first stone.”
That baby actually flipped upside down and landed perilously close to a fireplace. God indeed watches drunks and small children.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:18 pmESTI doubt YOU got beaten within inches of death yourself with regularity, Markku.
No I didn’t.
I also imagine you did stupid things just as did I
I caused inconvenience to my friend’s father once, and got beaten with a belt for it. Apart from that, never.
although maybe not as hurtful to anyone
You say that as if it weren’t the point. Which it is.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:21 pmESTFreedomlover,
I hope to God you’re trying to make a joke.
The compassion is that those 2 little shit-stains are still alive, that their names weren’t released to the public, and that their families didn’t get the shit beaten out of them for leaving these two turd burglars in care of a baby and doing stuff like this…
You see freedomlover, there is also this unwritten rule that actions have consequences. These 2 need to learn the consequences of their actions…
And to throw it back in your face, where’s the compassion to the baby in all of this? Did they think about that when they decided to go all retarded?
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:22 pmESTPersonally, I’d like to see this little prick tossed into a trebuchet and jettisoned over the roof of his house a few times. Then, for extra measure, the family of the baby should be allowed to surround the jerk’s crumpled Dixie Cup of a body and LAUGH at him til their sides split. Maybe they could record the sounds of his pathetic mewling, while they’re at it, and put the whole thing up on YouTube for the amusement of the rest of the world, too.
Dude, it would ROCK! Heh-heh…heh-heh…
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:23 pmESTI remember being a teenage boy. I remember being an incredibly stupid teenage boy at times. But I was never cruel or inhumane to any other human other than my dear friends who in turn treated me the same way. Many people are amazed that my friends and I actually survived our teenage years. But never would any of us ever considered a stunt like this -
so pass me a stone I’ll take a shot.
I don’t think most of us would make a very good “seething muslim mob.” Most of us are just frustrated with our namby-pamby-touchy-feel-good justice system’s almost total failure to adequately punish the evil doers in our society.
And I mean PUNISH. I don’t want a justice system or prison system designed to rehabilitate evil doers. I just want them punished for their indiscretions, and if the crime severe enough I want them removed from society for good (locked up or buried as appropriate).
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:30 pmESTRachel, I’m behind you in your quest for world domination.
I’m kind of grateful the sick fuck with the camera did film it…what goes on that we DON’T know about? And we can thank the “adults” on Jackass and other idiotic shows for putting more ideas into these morons’ heads.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:31 pmESTspoonhead,
Welcome! but just…damn.
Freedom Lover is a sophisticated commenter here, and it’s just annoying to have someone come in and lecture him/her on one flippant–and almost certainly tongue-in-cheek–comment.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:46 pmESTCan we also beat this douche’s dad for not raising him right?
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:50 pmESTI am for Genghis Khan-style justice here.
Boil them alive. Just SHAKING a baby that age can kill him. What they did could easily have killed him.
I honestly can’t believe our society has come to this…but I am serious when I say that what our criminal justice system needs is to get medieval in its punishment.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:51 pmESTSpivey is making things up. There’s no such nonsense legally taking place in our military.
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:59 pmESTThe question is….
How did they themselves react to the video?
If they laughed, then they are way beyond “stupid teenager tricks”—born of ignorance, inattention, and impulsivity.
But of course they laughed. They weren’t horrified. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have shown it around.
It shows sadism pure and simple.
Imagine what they would have done during future baby-sitting adventures if they hadn’t been caught.
Video #2
“Okay, how about this time, we shake him till his head wags back and forth real fast. I bet his crying will sound funny. Make sure you get close-ups.”
These are the same kind of guys who walked that little British boy out of the train station and then beat him to death with a brick. It must have been a hoot.
Punishment should be selected and delivered by the parents and other relatives.
This is what happens when persons are shown/taught that life is no longer sacred.
aborted third trimester fetus/crying baby.
No difference.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:01 pmESTI’m in. Where do I sign up?
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:04 pmESTIf that were my baby, I’d be the one arrested. I promise.
I agree with the stocks thoughts…public humiliation would better. Maybe we could replace the gas tax with the twerp beating fee?
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:09 pmESTI bet giving righteous ass-beatings is great cardio too.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:10 pmESTOH. MY. GOD.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:10 pmESTMoney + a shady private detective + a couple of Harley-Davidson dudes is a good combination.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:12 pmESTSee field manual Form 22-102.
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:27 pmEST14 karat:
See “humordocs” in URL
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:38 pmESTYes. I know. See page 21. And irony : )
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:39 pmESTThe old gun toting conservative republican hippie is back and having to be artsy fartsy I love your Idea Rachel and yes in these cases I do condone violence. I have a friend who is a foster care giver and some of her stories helped me write this poem.
NOT THE FORGIVING KIND
What about the children my god what have we done
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:50 pmESTHow can we overlook them just a single one
So innocent and friendly gross advantage some do take
We don’t punish severely and that is our mistake
If you ever hurt our children no excuses can you give
For your crime against the helpless we just might not let you live
They are young and so naïve, they will trust without a thought
You can say here kitty kitty or look candy I have brought
We do not understand them when they hurt that little child
But we sit there so complacent, when we should all be going wild
You try to tell some people; but it seems it is no use
We all can tell the difference between spanking and child abuse
I get whipped into a frenzy and I always lose my cool
Oh I did not mean to do it, who the hell you trying to fool
Here’s a warning when you go out and there’s children on your mind
If we catch you, you will suffer we are not the forgiving kind
Hello,
I’m doing a school project and I’m trying to gather data with a survey on blogs. Rachel was nice enough to give me permission to post the link, so if you would like to participate you can click the link below. Thank you!
Click Here to take survey
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:56 pmESTI have a running joke wherin I say I will become a YouTube Hero by riding down to Kimbo Slice’s neighborhood and challenging him to a fight. The point is how fucking ASSININE these fucking assholes are. Hell, some idiot asked him to hit him in the stomach as hard as he could, and, well, Kimbo being the gentleman he is, he did it. The ‘glory” of being on YouTube? The least ya could do is post it on MetaCafe and get your fucking nickel out of it. What the fuck???
This story gives me an idea that is based a little on that and a little on a Die Hard scene with Bruce Willis’ character somewhere on 129th street or some shit in Harlem wearing a sandwich board that says “I hate n*****s”.
Anyway, combine the sandwich board thing with Kimbo Slice & something like “I hate n*****s” on the front & “Kimbo Slice is a pussy” on the back and drop his ass off wherever it is that Kimbo Slice does his thing. FIlm it all. Post it on a pay per click site.
I tell ya, it’d be so fuckin easy to start a vigilante thing. Look how many morons ended up on “To Catch a Predator”.
I propose someone make a series of money is no object e-films for posting that makes it look like:
1) A pedophile has been entrapped & captured by our group and is mercilessly beaten
2) An old enuough teen who has done this kind of shit has been entrapped & captured and is mercilessly beaten
3) A walrus of a woman blocking Rachel from entering an aisle at Target has has been entrapped & captured by our group and is mercilessly beaten
Etc. Etc.
The point is, is it is all FAKE, so how could anyone get in trouble? It would send a fucking message and give the interweb stalkers reason to wonder. If it saved one life, it’d be worth it. Kinda like CCL, how many scumbags don’t try a crime because of the possibility that they will get worse than what they were planning on dishing out?
July 3rd, 2008 at 3:57 pmESTI couldn’t even watch past the first 15 seconds with the sound turned off… I could feel ice cold fingers wrapping around my heart and squeezing. Always happens when I know I can’t do anything to stop or prevent something bad from happening. I hate that feeling. Could someone please tell me the baby is okay?
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:19 pmESTWe’d make a “seething Muslim mob?” I don’t think so. Muslim mobs freak out about women showing ankle, or someone dropping a Koran, or a bunch of stupid cartoons of the Pedophile Prophet (who, frankly, lived pretty much like a sociopathic adolescent his entire life).
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:20 pmESTI have a serious suggestion. Take him in front of his entire high school. Pull his pants down and whip his butt until he cries and begs for it to stop.
Remember when you were in high school? What would have done to not have that happen to you?
It isn’t the pain, it is the shame and public humiliation that teens would do anything, even behave, to prevent
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:24 pmESTI’m voting for Rachel. That was a disgusting video. The two perps will not learn a lesson in the juvenile criminal justice system. They will merely be inconvenienced.
The perp and his camera man need a beating. Do what the Turks did to some of our folks (Air Force) they caught with some drugs in 1975. Our folks decided to wander on out of the police station since they’d been told to sit down but weren’t restrained. When they were caught the Turks removed their shoes.
Then they beat the bottoms of their feet with lead filled rubber hoses. I’d guess it sent a message that was hard to forget.
Every step these two take from now until the day they die should be filled with pain.
And Sam Hall’s idea of public humiliation in front of their peers is a real demotivator for future stupidity.
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:49 pmESTLast update I could find. Sorry.
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:56 pmESTI saw the video and I tried to pretend it was a fake with a crying baby doll. I tried to think that because the bloodlust rising within me was starting to nauseate me. When I finally accepted that these little shitstains were indeed shooting an infant like a dog’s chew toy, I realized that the cure for my RCOB (thanks, Kim du Toit) existed: if I could beat these turds into bloody pulp, I’d feel better.
I swear that it’s times like this it’s difficult for me to even try to act like a Christian because I want to fucking kill them, raise them from the dead and then kill them. Over and over again. God wants to forgive them? That’s his business. Mine is setting up the meeting.
Sorry if this comment is incoherent because I simply cannot wrap my brain around this.
July 3rd, 2008 at 4:59 pmESTAppreciate the effort. When it comes to babies and small animals I’m just one big softie…
The garden hose filled with lead sounds perfect for those two. Don’t forget the hands…
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:05 pmESTYou’ve got my vote Rachel.
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:05 pmESTA Blanket party for those two sounds excellent *just channelled Mr.Burns there* I can think of maaaany things to do to these two sicko’s and be 100% serious about it:)
That was terrible. And the producer that insisted on playing it again and again behind the report deserves a beating, too. That poor baby.
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:22 pmESTLord of the Flies, Clockwork Orange — take your pick!
Pillories, stocks, public/private beatings — whatever it takes to get it into those boys’ skulls that certain behaviors are simply intolerable, and actions have consequences. Might help them acquire a little empathy, too, if done properly.
It mustn’t end there, though — the boys’ parents need ‘guidance’ as well.
What intelligent adult leaves an infant in the ‘care’ of not one (one at a time, boys are usually pretty nearly human!) but two teenage boys not only unrelated to each other, but unrelated to the infant? It sounds like a Fark headline: Two teenage boys, a giant, inflatable pillow, a video camera, and an infant — what could possibly go wrong? Stupid, sick, evil, things? Ya think? Arrrrgh — makes me want to smack the teen’s mother around!
It’s been reasonably well documented that the risk of child abuse — especially fatal abuse — skyrockets when care is expected from emotionally unattached, biologically unrelated males. (Not to be confused with decent Stepdads, adoptive Dads, etc — all of whom have effectively assumed the social and emotional role of ‘Dad’ — different animal altogether!) Somehow I seriously doubt that the parents of the infant meant for the kid and his buddy to ‘take care’ of that baby!
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:30 pmESTSeriously — the baby was thrown once (thank God for small favors!), but the sequence was repeated over and over — sick!
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:33 pmESTMaybe your Firefly bud could get serious donations in order to produce top quality fake videos that look real enough to possibly scare people into behaving themselves. It seems like the concept has real potential to me. Propaganda and scare tactics I guess. If our justice system can’t prevent and/or punish this fuckin shit, someone has to try. It’s the best idea I can come up with that keeps everyone’s hands clean. A fake vigilante group that makes any scumbag think it is is real & has justice in spades could wield some real power.
I wonder if any attorneys that read your blog and comments could say whether or not any charges like inducing panic could stick on the people responsible for a fake video that is produced and posted.
I mean it. I think this is a good idea.
What do you say to a pedophile with two black eyes? Nothin. You done told him twiced. Fuckin’ kill him already.
July 3rd, 2008 at 5:52 pmESTI literally can’t get that crying out of my head. Scientists have shown humans are genetically hardwired to respond to the sound of an infant crying with all their protective instincts. The fact that these two smears-of-excrement-that-walk-like-men reacted by laughing at the baby’s fear and pain is all the proof I need that they have defaulted on their union dues to the human race, and as such have forfeited all membership rights and privileges.
I’m torn between two options as to which fate should befall these filthy pieces of distended rectum.
Option 1: They are strapped down, and chunks of their body are cut off, about a pound or so per day, starting at the feet and working one’s way up towards the head. These one-pound chunks are then deep fried in full view of the miscreants, who are then forced to eat their own deep-fried body parts every day until the process kills them.
Option 2: Just set the frakkers on fire.
Now, I like Option 1 for originality (indeed I’m perversely proud of the idea, in a way), but I fear that these damp tufts of rectal pubic hair would succumb to catatonic madness entirely too early and would fail to properly appreciate the horror of their situation. On the other hand, while unsatisfyingly quick, Option 2 would guarantee that the little Frellers are in agonizing pain right up to the very end. After all, like the old proverb says: “Build a man a fire, and he is warm for one night. Set a man on fire, and he is warm for the rest of his life.”
July 3rd, 2008 at 7:40 pmESTChrist, that’s a tough thing to watch- I only made it to the 22 second point when I had to turn it off. So much for being a big macho type.
July 3rd, 2008 at 8:39 pmESTI’m in.
July 3rd, 2008 at 9:48 pmESTRachel,
A disclaimer stronger than the one you provided is requested on further videos that may send me into a homicidal rage.
No, I am not kidding.
Couple that with the fucking disgusting meat photo at the top right advertisement of your blog and I honestly had to just go take a walk to cool off.
PURE RAGE/
…And I’m a fomer Paratrooper who honestly knows how to do bad bad things.
Please, next time. WARN US>
July 3rd, 2008 at 10:01 pmESTHoly shit, Rachel! Where do you find these abominations?
As for the teenage boys: death. For the video technician and the abuser. They are so morally empty, so completely indecent, they add no value to the world whatsoever.
And while we’re at it, the people who need to be flogged publicly are their parents. The family deserves to be shamed for producing these roaches.
My heart is still pounding fifteen minutes after watching that video, without sound.
July 4th, 2008 at 12:54 amESTPara and Melissa,
Your outrage is absolutely noted, and as a fellow human being I thank you for your mutual indignation.
In the day, I was an in-home, state-licensed, wait-list having, loving-fun providing, chidcare provider. Shit such as this locks up your jaw to avoid vomiting, and eventually loosens it to spew the outrage.
July 4th, 2008 at 1:44 amESTEnough said.
I agree with those who need a disclaimer. I’m a brand-spankin’-new mama who is just about hyperventilating at the scene (not to mention the AUDACITY and SHEER HEARTLESSNESS of that media coverage to play that over and over . . . *shudder*) . . . I’m seriously afraid I might have nightmares about that tonight . . .
PLEASE PLEASE put disclaimers on disturbing videos like that? I’m only asking because this was too traumatizing, and the video itself didn’t have a strong disclaimer, like it should have.
SERIOUSLY, do the media execs/producers/etc. get off on things like that?!
(Now I’m off to check on my baby and think happy thoughts . . . )
July 4th, 2008 at 1:51 amESTI’ve baby sitted children when I was a teenager. I’d never, ever, ever even thought of doing something like this.
Beating is too good for them.
July 4th, 2008 at 1:58 amESTI would not kill them, at least not until they begged me to.
July 4th, 2008 at 7:25 amESTThere is a strange ideology going on nowadays, that Christianity sees torture as somehow bad. Nothing could be further from the truth. Scourging was common at the time the Bible was written, and there is not even one word in the Bible against.
“But Jesus would forgive!” No. If we accept that line of reasoning, we can’t have ANY punishments. Forgiveness is complete absolution. Jail time? No, Jesus would forgive. Fines? No, Jesus would forgive. Telling them they have been bad? No, Jesus would forgive.
July 4th, 2008 at 7:28 amESTI carry a badge and gun for a living and worry about coming up on shit like this for real; I would likely be out of a job and in jail myself within minutes. I guess I’ve been lucky but haven’t seen anything this bad in 16 years of work. God grant I don’t. I just keep thinking about my granddaughter.
July 4th, 2008 at 7:50 amESTPersonally, after beating those two sociopathic little scumbags till they wouldn’t fit a coffin, I’d maroon them. Drop them onto an island somewhere…we do still own the Aleutians, I believe…with a few days’ worth of supplies, and leave them there.
Oh, and tattoo them on the forehead with a mark that can’t be hidden, and tell them that if they ever show up in civilization again, anybody who brings in their disattached head (and it would have to be disattached) to the nearest police station gets $50,000 cash, tax-free.
Then they get to play a new game called “Arctic Survival When You Don’t Know How!” See how long they last.
Either that, or take a bunch of these shitstains and put ‘em on an island to play Battle Royale.
July 4th, 2008 at 10:30 amESTWarning has been added, and I’m sorry I didn’t do it before. I just figured that since the baby isn’t actually wounded physically, it wouldn’t need a stern warning, but after watching it again a few times with the sound a little higher, I decided you guys are right. It’s the crying that really, really gets you. And the baby easily COULD HAVE been hurt or even killed.
I don’t even particularly like babies, but this video makes me want to find out and cuddle it for a week while I plot the deaths of those two teenage shitheads. And their parents. And the parents of the baby for leaving him with these psychopaths.
July 4th, 2008 at 10:42 amESTHave you ever seen a punkin chunkin competition?
I say we pool our money and build really big punkin chunkin cannon - large enough to launch those two shit-stains 1000 yards down range.
That poor little baby should be put up for adoption.
The parents should publicly flogged and then sterilized to prevent this sort crime from ever happening again.
July 4th, 2008 at 12:49 pmESTI think that report overdid the repeat showings of the video, jeez. I’m not going to go back and count, but I saw it the first 10 times for shit’s sake.
As for the “kids” that did this, they most definitely deserve an ass beating. I’d get in line for that. I’ve often said we should bring back the stocks and public humiliation. These would be the perfect candidates for such treatment. Little useless fuckers. I also think we should use people like Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka for medical testing.
It’s so horrible to watch and hear that poor baby crying like that - babies aren’t supposed to cry like that. :’( I can’t even listen to babies crying in prams while their minders continue chattering and do nothing for the poor little thing. I have to get out of earshot or I’ll have to pick it up myself. No one would “let” a puppy “cry it out” alone.
July 4th, 2008 at 12:56 pmESTI think the kids (both of them) should suffer the same teatment but scaled up to compensate for size (teen vs baby). Big big air pillow. The 2 sociopath idiots on it one by one. Huge huge guy jumps on pillow from high up. Kids fly, land on something hard somewhere, hopefully arms, legs, whatever, are in pieces. Everybody claps. What fun. Do it again. Make sure to video it. Put it on utube for the world to see.
July 4th, 2008 at 5:07 pmESTOT: isn’t that one of the arguments most used by liberals?
I was taught that Jesus does forgive - if you realize what you have done wrong, repent deeply and sincerely and spend time trying to make amends.
As one of my favorite authors wrote, “God isn’t a vending machine were you instert the coin, pull the lever and out come forgiveness and confort”.
I highly dubt those two pieces of manure are even vaguely aware of having done something wrong.
July 5th, 2008 at 3:22 amESTOoh, I can practically hear them: “But it was just a joke! We meant no harm!”
Argh!
Came in late on this one. After watching the video - and only able to do that once - I just sat here gob-smacked. Talk about RCOB moments - these guys need to be flayed alive and spread on an anthill. NO excuses can be made for this kind of behaviour.
Lance De Boyle said ‘This is what happens when persons are shown/taught that life is no longer sacred.’ - spot on, Lance. Man, this literally left me shaking..
July 5th, 2008 at 4:52 amEST“OT: isn’t that one of the arguments most used by liberals?”
Yes. I’m a fundamentalist Christian, and not only do I get headache from the illogic of the argument, the obvious condescension involved in it towards Christianity adds a completely new dimension.
Repentance is required for forgiveness, and these teenagers would probably be psychologically incapable of it, even if they wanted to be repentant.
July 5th, 2008 at 6:04 amESTOh My God. Rachel I am so with you on this. Your idea is brilliant. What did the parents of that little baby think when they found out about this and saw that video?? The Ass Beating should include many, many broken bones and other bodily torments. I’ll bring the pliers and the hot coals. And I agree with some others here: who were this fucker’s scumbag parents?? They too need an Ass Beating.
As usual, you clearly demonstrate the undeniable need to elect you as World Leader.
Lone
July 5th, 2008 at 8:33 amEST“God isn’t a vending machine were you instert the coin, pull the lever and out come forgiveness and confort”.
you’re damn right. Punishment or making right the wrong that was committed has to come first.
I’ll gladly give a few minutes of my time to become “engaged” in the justice system.
5 minutes and baseball bat is all I ask.
July 5th, 2008 at 11:48 amESTYep. You would have my vote, and the services of my entire flogger collection at your beck and call. My god that was a horrific video …
July 5th, 2008 at 12:10 pmESTInsanely horrible…fucking jerks
July 5th, 2008 at 1:04 pmESTI know it has been said, but the first thing I thought of was bringing back the stocks. But I would definitely not allow a cup. The most important service we could provide would be to make sure this fucktard never had any more kids and ’snipping’ him would be way too expensive at the going rates.
July 7th, 2008 at 7:36 amESTDearRachel,
I feel compelled to share a GReat Idea (TM) that I myself have had. And I am completely serious about this.
The government issue “One Free Shot” passes for a $50,000 bond. The concept is that anyone who is authorized to buy a gun (no criminals or mentally unfit people) could put up a $50,000 bond and get essentially a license to shoot anyone else once. Plus decals to put on your car’s rear window and on house windows.
If you never shoot anyone, the bond remains available for you to recoup by returning the pass at any time. If you ever decide to shoot someone, like in road rage or a fit of jealousy, you just go ahead and take your one shot and wait for the police to show up. When they do, you give them your pass, they let you go and confiscate the pass, which is returned to the BATF or whatever Agency issues it to be cancelled. You lose your bond.
Now think about this:
1. Can you imagine how much of the national debt could be retired by selling these things?
2. And how many people who “just needed shootin’” would be removed from bothering the rest of the innocent public?
3. Road rage would disappear, at least once a sizeable number of decals showed up during rush hour. People in gun shows are remarkably polite because so many are armed. Extends the concept nationwide.
4. Suddenly fidelity would become the norm, after all, it kind of makes it hard to perform when you realize that the husband could show up at any time and get away with shooting you dead.
5. Liberals would tone down the rhetoric.
6. Conservatives would not have to worry about liberals getting permits because, after all, we dont worry about them having guns right now, do we?
Please feel free to polish this idea as you see fit and implement.
v/r
July 7th, 2008 at 3:32 pmESTmike
Thanks for the warning. I didn’t watch the video. The evil boys should be shot.
July 10th, 2008 at 2:01 amEST