Fired? I thought you worked at home. How are they to know? Are 'they' watching you? Do they count your key strokes? Are you paranoid? Why didn't you number the items? (Who is this guy, anyway?)

I'm very glad you're a medical transcriptionist, Rachel . . . because you would be the scariest therapist on Earth.

.

I totally filled it out. Because I am SO BORED right now.

I emailed it to you Rachel.

"DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD?"
You sound like a lady friend of mine who can't stand kids. Mind you, she was a teacher for many years - a good enough reason to end up hating the little monsters.

"HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL"
No-one, but no-one could pay me enough - my mind just quails at the the thought [excuse me for a second while I go and puke ...... ah, that's better]

"IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT?"
Let's just say the tears were flowing freely...

You've started something here...

Would you hate us if we provided lotsa answers in a comment here because we don't have blogs?

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD?

You don't want to know.

ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER?

Yesterday I couldn't figure out how to correctly write a lowercase "q".

DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.)

Unequivocally so.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD?

I'm studying to be a teacher, so liking kids (or at least not hating them) is kinda part of my job description.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? DON'T TRY TO DENY IT.

I'd wait until my owners had company over and I'd do it all day long, in the center of the room, with much licking and popping noises as musical accompaniment.

IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY?

I would choose to be very smart so I could get filthy rich. Then women would throw themselves at me anyway.

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL (DEPENDING ON YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCE BUT DOES THAT REALLY MATTER WITH THESE TWO)?

Six thousand Quatloos.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CUSS WORD?

The "r" word (and if you don't know what it is I'm not telling).

IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT?

I don't know. I think I repressed the memory.

DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE.

I was having intimate relations with Rosie O'Donnell.

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE?

Nah. I'd prefer pistols at dawn.

WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING?

Whatever God-awful thing happened to Michael Jackson.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE BEFORE THE LAST TIME YOU THREW UP?

The entrails of those who choose to oppose me.

FAVORITE BODILY FUNCTION? (COUGH, SNEEZE, BELCH, POOP, FART, YAWN, ETC)

Belching. Belching is just awesome.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A HUGE FIGHT WITH,

Muhammed Ali.

WHAT WAS THE FIGHT ABOUT,

Whether abbreviations count in Scrabble (THEY DON'T AND ANYONE WHO SAYS DIFFERENT IS A COMMUNIST!).

AND WHO WON?

My memory's a little fuzzy so I can't say for sure. However, what I can be sure of is that Aquaman lost.

BALD MEN ARE VERY SEXY. DISCUSS.

This question makes me uncomfortable.

FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS?

Barbecued vegetables. I can eat raw vegetables, steamed vegetables, even baked vegetables, but I just don't get barbecued vegetables.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED THAT MADE YOU GET ON YOUR KNEES AFTERWARDS AND BEG GOD TO GIVE YOU THE LAST TWO HOURS OF YOUR LIFE BACK?

Dogma. My roomate loves that movie and he wouldn't change the channel. (Interesting side note, since it was daylight savings time and I started watching in the middle of the movie, technically I did get the time back.)

FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS?

Arby's chicken sandwich.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DISGUSTED BY A BOOK'S ENDING THAT YOU VIOLENTLY DESTROYED THE BOOK?

Once. I have since been banned from Barnes and Nobles.

DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE.

...Maybe.

MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON?

A Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to Al Gore, a Fred Thompson haymaker to Jesse Jackson.

WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP.

Incredibly bad drunken poetry.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD YOU USE IT FOR GOOD OR EVIL?

Everyone already has superpowers. Mine is making everyone else's superpowers not work.

ARL, you can start a blog in five minutes at blogger.com. It costs nothing, and they'll even give you free hosting at blogspot.com if you don't have server space you can use.

Rachel, you rock. You just do.

Oh, and your top ad on the Google ad sidebar was for Adult Diapers. So I clicked on it, because you told me to. Four times.

Do your trackbacks notify you? If not, I posted .

WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW?

I never cry. But if I WERE to cry, I would make someone ELSE look ugly.

“It’s MY party and YOU’LL cry if I want you to.”

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.)

Vegetarians are my favorite lunch meet. Nothing better than sliced vegan on a bun.
[Pickle optional, as always.]

DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

Oh, yeah, sure, right. I use sarcasm a lot. Ha.

ARE YOU AS FRIGHTENED OF CLOWNS AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU?

Clowns are frightened of ME. I hold up a nice vegan patty and say, "Just squirt seltzer down your pants, Mr. Big Shoes, and this will be YOU.

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH ROSIE O'DONNELL?

Actually, I HAD intimate relations with Rosie O’Donnell. She really sucked.
Then I ran. Fast.

DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE.

I dreamt that I had sex with Rosie O’Donnell, but didn’t have money for a tip. Then I ran. Fast.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

Whether they are alive. If not, I tie their shoe laces together, as a practical joke. I also apply some eye shadow (to them), but waaaay too much. So they look like a tart, or slut. Then I laugh.

"Ha. Dead tart, or slut."

WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS?

One time, some kids were yacking. I leaned over and said, “One more yack and I’ll cut your eyes out.”

They were infants. But that's no reason to yack.

done.

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD? Stinky.

WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW? Uhm, never looked at myself, but I would have to guess ugly

ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER? omg, yes. And is going to get worse as I have recently started using dictation software. Soon I won't even be able to form a proper sentence.

DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.) Of course they are insane (looking at my vegetarian brother and sister in law). I am such a carnivore.

DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD? I don't have any kids but am contemplating some. And to make it worse, I am considering having them in my 40's. I plead insanity.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? DON'T TRY TO DENY IT. I would have no friends and no life but would just be known as the hermit who was always smiling.

ARE YOU AS FRIGHTENED OF CLOWNS AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU? You know, I have started to really start to understand this clown fear recently....

IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY? Beauty is tempting, just for the immediate gratification, but smarts will get me more in the long run, so I will say smart.

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL (DEPENDING ON YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCE BUT DOES THAT REALLY MATTER WITH THESE TWO)? There is a difference between the two? I mean, other than about 50 pounds? I really don't think I could have intimate relations with either for any amount of money. Mr Happy just wouldn't cooperate.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CUSS WORD? F*ck

IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT? IF YOU'RE A WOMAN, HOW GLAD ARE YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT A MAN? Oh yes, I have done this, and the pain is excruciating. Especially when you do it twice within 30 minutes. *wince*

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO GROW OLD OR DIE TRAGICALLY YOUNG? I am already old so it is too late to die tragically young.

DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE. Being set afire and not being able to put it out.

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE? I would soooo love this.

ABBA: THE BLONDE OR THE BRUNETTE? Hmmm, just on principle, I'll go brunette

WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING? Any STD. I have never had one and I hope I never do.

WHO DO YOU MISS THE LEAST? My second ex-wife. She was truly a violent, controlling, crack whore. I literally burned everything I had of hers after I divorced her and I have done my best to try to black out that part of my life.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE SHOPPING FOR NEW CLOTHES (10 BEING SO MUCH YOU'D RATHER CLEAN THE CAT BOX WITH YOUR BARE HANDS). Eh, a 6. It isn't so bad and I sometimes relish picking clothes that will make others cringe when I wear em.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE BEFORE THE LAST TIME YOU THREW UP? When was the last time I threw up? Ah yes, the image of intimate relations with Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. (retches again) Hmmm, looks like cinnamon toast.

NAME FIVE "CLASSIC" POPULAR SONGS YOU HOPE YOU NEVER HEAR AGAIN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE. Any Beatles songs

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WHICH BREED WOULD YOU BE? Hmmm, probably a Scottish Terrier, but then I am biased.

FAVORITE BODILY FUNCTION? (COUGH, SNEEZE, BELCH, POOP, FART, YAWN, ETC) Other than the obvious one of orgasm, I would say peeing. I have been known to have my eyes roll back in pleasure while peeing....

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A HUGE FIGHT WITH, WHAT WAS THE FIGHT ABOUT, AND WHO WON? Hmmm, probably my brother, it was about politics (he is a leftie) and neither one of us won. Fights over politics and religion almost never have winners.

AS WE ALL KNOW, PRO FOOTBALL IS THE ONLY SPORT WORTH CARING ABOUT. IN LIGHT OF THAT FACT, WHO IS THE BEST NFL QUARTERBACK OF THE LAST 10 YEARS? BEST RUNNING BACK? BEST WIDE RECEIVER? BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER? BIGGEST PRIMA DONNA? WHINIEST BITCH? I enjoy football, but it has been years since I watch, so I will have to pass on this.

BALD MEN ARE VERY SEXY. DISCUSS. (Looks at his bald brother) This kinda creeps me out.....

THE INVENTION OF THE PILL IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO BELIEVE IN GOD. DISCUSS. Agreed

DO YOU HAVE PERFECT VISION? IF SO, RACHEL LUCAS ENVIES YOU WITH THE FIRE OF A THOUSAND GALAXIES. I used to have poor vision, but then I had my eyes lasered. I haven't worn contacts since.

FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS? Any raw seafood. *shudder*

WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS? I should challenge them to fisticuffs but I usually just move.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED THAT MADE YOU GET ON YOUR KNEES AFTERWARDS AND BEG GOD TO GIVE YOU THE LAST TWO HOURS OF YOUR LIFE BACK? Rocky and Bullwinkle. I have never left a movie early and when I went to that one, my date wanted to walk out, but I said no. I apologized to her for weeks afterwards.

DO YOU EVER PUT CLOTHES ON YOUR PETS? I am ashamed to say that I have in the past but I was under the influence of a woman at the time so I plead temporary insanity

BEER, WINE, OR LIQUOR? Liquor

FALL ASLEEP OR CUDDLE? Cuddle. That way I can cop some feels as I fall asleep.

FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS? bacon. Omg, I love bacon.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DISGUSTED BY A BOOK'S ENDING THAT YOU VIOLENTLY DESTROYED THE BOOK? Honestly, no.

DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE. Yes, so much that I had to upgrade my hard drive.

TRUE OR FALSE: "REALITY" T.V. IS THE BEST REASON FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD TO HATE AMERICA. True. "Reality" tv is just stupid. That being said, I have been sucked into a few episodes of "Dancing with the Stars" and "America's Next Top Model"

FAVORITE DRUNKEN SLATTERN: PARIS, LINDSEY, OR BRITNEY? Britney by far. She used to be cute and the others are just sad.

MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON? Jesse by far. Al is just an idiot but I truly think Jesse is consciously malignant.

WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP. Nothing spectactular. I was at home, staggered up the stairs, into the bathoom for a quick visit, and then passed out on the bed. The second time was much more interesting as two female friends of mine conspired to get me drunk that time....

IF YOU COULD HAVE MAD SKILLZ IN DANCING OR IN SINGING, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD IT BE FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL SATISFACTION OR TO IMPRESS OTHER PEOPLE AND POSSIBLY GET SOME ACTION? Probably in singing and mostly to impress others and get me some.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD YOU USE IT FOR GOOD OR EVIL? The ability to change shape and mass. With that, I could fly (wings), be nearly invisible (shrink) or many other things. I would use it partially for good and partially for my own benefit (some of which would probably be considered evil by some)

IF YOU NEVER SEE ANOTHER Q&A MEME AGAIN, WILL IT BE TOO SOON? Most I ignore, but I enjoyed this one. I will now resume ignoring them.....

This mommy meme should have been killed when you had the chance.
Now, it only grows stronger.

Ha. I did the when I got tagged for this one. How lame were those questions?

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD? Mouse, Moose, but the one that really hurt was "Billy" - because I had to figure that guy had actually mistaken me for Billy-the-Retard.

WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW? Never looked in the mirror.

ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER? What's handwriting?

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Vegetarians.

DO YOU LIKE KIDS? Properly cooked. --WC Fields)

Seriously, I have two kids and five grandkids. I must like them, but I have no idea why.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? Duh!

IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY? I'm already very smart, so it might help if I didn't look so much like Jerry Lewis playing a mad scientist.

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL? Let's see, how much would it take to divorce my wife and marry Lindsay Lohan?
I guess I could tape Rosie's mouth shut, close my eyes, and pretend it was my wife. Rosie might even be a few pounds lighter, but that voice....

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO GROW OLD OR DIE TRAGICALLY YOUNG? After 5 grandkids, is it too late for "tragically young"?

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE? I'd prefer duels to the death. With the candidates on offer recently, preferably they'd be armed with handgrenades and their left arms tied together. Very few of them would have the sense to beat their opponent to death with the grenade...

WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING? Alzheimers.

HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE SHOPPING FOR NEW CLOTHES (10 BEING SO MUCH YOU'D RATHER CLEAN THE CAT BOX WITH YOUR BARE HANDS). 9

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WHICH BREED WOULD YOU BE? A wolf. Humans shouldn't be domesticated. (That's a paraphrase of something by Robert A. Heinlein.)

THE INVENTION OF THE PILL IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO BELIEVE IN GOD. I'm old enough to remember when if you got a girl pregnant, you had to marry her, drop out of highschool and get a job, and in summary you "ruined your life." Hers, too. The pill is a huge advance in civilization. But what does God have to do with it?

FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS? Sauerkraut. The only thing worse is the Korean version (kimshi).

DO YOU EVER PUT CLOTHES ON YOUR PETS? That's disgusting.

FALL ASLEEP OR CUDDLE? (Snoring)

FAVORITE DESSERT? FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS? French fries.

If only we could make them from real Frenchmen.

DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE. Define porn.

TRUE OR FALSE: "REALITY" T.V. IS THE BEST REASON FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD TO HATE AMERICA. True.

FAVORITE DRUNKEN SLATTERN: PARIS, LINDSEY, OR BRITNEY? Lindsey

MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON? Why not both?

IF YOU NEVER SEE ANOTHER Q&A MEME AGAIN, WILL IT BE TOO SOON? Yes.

Oh my goodness....here I am laughing crazily at work. Those new revised questions are brilliant! They give much more insight into a person's psyche than the standards.

"ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER?"

That's actually really sad because it's happening to so many people. I love to write letters in long hand but I admit that I struggle with the cursive letters sometimes. Very sad.

"DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.)"

DUH!

"IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY?"

That's actually a very hard question. If I were very very beautiful I could perhaps get a rich husband who was smart and not have to worry about life. Then again, if I were very smart I could make my own money and get surgery to become very beautiful. And why can't I be BOTH?!?!?

"DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE."

Hillary was president!!!

"WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS?"

My husband has to hold me back from strangling the bastard. I'm obnoxious! :)

"WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP."

Swear on the grave of my father that I have never, ever been drunk. Never. Not once. I've tried various alcoholic drinks. None of them strike my fancy. I don't get the appeal of getting drunk. Now...I've been high on sugar. Does that count for anything???

Love reading everyone's answers!

Rachel, thanks for the head's up on Transformers. I'm not a big fan of no-plot CGI flicks. I guess it's Georgia Rule for me. (TOTALLY KIDDING!)

Count me in. Those questions are so much fun I had to answer them. Rachel, I would be disturbed by your thought processes if they weren't so similar to mine.

Now let's never speak of this again.

Here ya go.

K

Well, it killed an evening...

Another hour or 2 of my life that I won't get back but time was made for wasting.

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD? I'm not sure, I spent most of my time avoiding the others.

WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW? I don't cry.

ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER? I keep a daily journal/diary so I keep in practice.

DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.) "Insane" is an overused word but vegetarians are definitely nutjobs.

DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD? I cannot abide kids.

IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I cannot imagine, nor desire, being another person.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? DON'T TRY TO DENY IT. I must admit the ability to lick oneself is an interesting evolutionary concept.

ARE YOU AS FRIGHTENED OF CLOWNS AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU? WTF???

IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY? I'd rather continue being very smart. Since I am bald, a question below describes as "sexy."

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL (DEPENDING ON YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCE BUT DOES THAT REALLY MATTER WITH THESE TWO)? I cannot imagine the amount, or type, of remuneration required for me to have any relation with either of them except my current one of hatred.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CUSS WORD? Bullshit.

IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT? As a teenager, and drunk, I did catch Mr. Clubb in the zipper after having accidentally pissed upon an electric fence. It probably hurt but Mr. Clubb was numb from the electric jolt.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO GROW OLD OR DIE TRAGICALLY YOUNG? Well, I'm 55 years old...

DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE. Yesterday I was in a laundromat and there were children running around untethered.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? I try avoiding noticing people.

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE? Any duel requiring moral courage and intestinal fortitude would keep Democrats out of the White House.

ABBA: THE BLONDE OR THE BRUNETTE? I don't understand the question.

WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING? Liberalism.

WHO DO YOU MISS THE LEAST? The last person I met.

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE SHOPPING FOR NEW CLOTHES (10 BEING SO MUCH YOU'D RATHER CLEAN THE CAT BOX WITH YOUR BARE HANDS). '10' I suppose because I just hate to shop but I ain't sticking my hands in any kind of fecal matter.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE BEFORE THE LAST TIME YOU THREW UP? I don't remember the last time I tossed my cookies.

NAME FIVE "CLASSIC" POPULAR SONGS YOU HOPE YOU NEVER HEAR AGAIN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE. Randomly pick five songs written since 1975.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WHICH BREED WOULD YOU BE? Can't say; I'm not a pet person.

FAVORITE SMELLS? FAVORITE BODILY FUNCTION? (COUGH, SNEEZE, BELCH, POOP, FART, YAWN, ETC) Eating.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A HUGE FIGHT WITH, WHAT WAS THE FIGHT ABOUT, AND WHO WON? Just after having been discharged from the Coast Guard in 1974, I'd been home a couple of months when a drunk hippie picked a fight with semi-sober me. I handily stomped him into the gravel.

FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Fuck sports.

BALD MEN ARE VERY SEXY. DISCUSS. Well, I am bald so...

THE INVENTION OF THE PILL IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO BELIEVE IN GOD. DISCUSS. I believe it was a stepping stone to the current disrespect of women as a whole.

DO YOU HAVE PERFECT VISION? IF SO, RACHEL LUCAS ENVIES YOU WITH THE FIRE OF A THOUSAND GALAXIES. No, I wear glasses.

FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS? Most foods eaten by foreigners. Some folks prefer their foods slimey, stinking and sometimes alive.

WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS? The last time my wife dragged me to a movie a teenager was kicking my seat. I borrowed R. Lee Ermey's line: "If you don't stop annoying me I'm going to gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you." I didn't hear a peep from the little prick for the rest of my (boring) stay.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED THAT MADE YOU GET ON YOUR KNEES AFTERWARDS AND BEG GOD TO GIVE YOU THE LAST TWO HOURS OF YOUR LIFE BACK? Re: the last question. "Titanic" I think.

DO YOU EVER PUT CLOTHES ON YOUR PETS? I'm not a pet person.

BEER, WINE, OR LIQUOR? Irish beer and high-quality cognac.

FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS? Damned near raw beef and/or blueberry topped cheesecake.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DISGUSTED BY A BOOK'S ENDING THAT YOU VIOLENTLY DESTROYED THE BOOK? I've never destroyed a book but I have tossed them into the garbage.

DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE. I find porn rather boring.

TRUE OR FALSE: "REALITY" T.V. IS THE BEST REASON FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD TO HATE AMERICA. I can honestly say I've never watched reality TV but if what I've heard is true, your query would be answered as "true."

FAVORITE SOUND? Rifle fire at the range.

FAVORITE DRUNKEN SLATTERN: PARIS, LINDSEY, OR BRITNEY? I do not know who Lindsey is and I am not really sure who Britney is so by default Paris, assuming you are referring Miss Hilton.

MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON? Well, Algore was born brain-damaged so his actions can be viewed with pity but Jackson is a calculting, completely self-absorbed asshole so sic Mr. Norris on the Rev. Jackson.

WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP. I got drunk.

IF YOU COULD HAVE MAD SKILLZ IN DANCING OR IN SINGING, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD IT BE FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL SATISFACTION OR TO IMPRESS OTHER PEOPLE AND POSSIBLY GET SOME ACTION? Singing for my personal satisfaction.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD YOU USE IT FOR GOOD OR EVIL? Immortality. The good or evil part would depend upon y'all's definition of good and evil.

WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? IF YOU NEVER SEE ANOTHER Q&A MEME AGAIN, WILL IT BE TOO SOON? Probably.

Here's mine:

Mine is done! Much fun!

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD?
Hodge Podge Lodge
WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW?
I’ll have to guess ugly since that it makes children run away and grown men scream in horror.
ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER? CLUE:
Just today at the gas station when I was signing the credit card slip, the lady says, “Wow, I bet nobody can forge YOUR signature”. If I heard that 3 million more times
DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.)
If God did not want us to eat animals, He would not have made them taste like MEAT.
DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD?
I love kids. This way I can honestly say I do not want illegal immigration, slavery and oppression of my fellow human being, but all the time legally and morally reaping the benefits of same in spades.
IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? DON'T TRY TO DENY IT.
Who says I cannot lick myself now?
ARE YOU AS FRIGHTENED OF CLOWNS AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU?
Clowns only eat you when you sleep. Only pussies sleep. Trick question.
IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY?
Why isn’t Sarcastic one of the options?
HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL (DEPENDING ON YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCE BUT DOES THAT REALLY MATTER WITH THESE TWO)?
I hate to sound like a tired MasterCard commercial
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CUSS WORD?
Fuck
IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT? IF YOU'RE A WOMAN, HOW GLAD ARE YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT A MAN?
More than a dozen times, and for the record, it can be likened to the last 60 seconds of delivery.
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO GROW OLD OR DIE TRAGICALLY YOUNG?
Too late
DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you, the 44th President of the United States of America, Barak Hussein Obama”

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE?
This one answered itself.
ABBA: THE BLONDE OR THE BRUNETTE?
Whichever one didn’t get the boob job.
? WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING?
Liberalism.

WHO DO YOU MISS THE LEAST?
My fans.
ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE SHOPPING FOR NEW CLOTHES (10 BEING SO MUCH YOU'D RATHER CLEAN THE CAT BOX WITH YOUR BARE HANDS).
8
WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE BEFORE THE LAST TIME YOU THREW UP?
Chocolate Ice Cream.
NAME FIVE "CLASSIC" POPULAR SONGS YOU HOPE YOU NEVER HEAR AGAIN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.
Raindrops keep falling on my head, Tony Orlando - Champagne Supernova, Oasis - Karma Chameleon, Boy George - Maxwell’s Silver Hammer, Beatles - Murder by Numbers, Police.
IF YOU WERE A DOG, WHICH BREED WOULD YOU BE?
Rhodesian Ridgeback
FAVORITE BODILY FUNCTION? (COUGH, SNEEZE, BELCH, POOP, FART, YAWN, ETC)
Orgasm, duh.

WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A HUGE FIGHT WITH, WHAT WAS THE FIGHT ABOUT, AND WHO WON?
The County Sheriffs, they did, they had guns.
AS WE ALL KNOW, PRO FOOTBALL IS THE ONLY SPORT WORTH CARING ABOUT. IN LIGHT OF THAT FACT, WHO IS THE BEST NFL QUARTERBACK OF THE LAST 10 YEARS? BEST RUNNING BACK? BEST WIDE RECEIVER? BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER? BIGGEST PRIMA DONNA? WHINIEST BITCH?
I am at a bit of a disadvantage here. My religion requires me to spend all day Sunday and most of Monday having non-stop sex, therefore, I would have to Google the answers and that is simply dishonest.
BALD MEN ARE VERY SEXY. DISCUSS.
I never got an erection watch Capt. Picard sitting on the bridge of the Enterprise. Promise me when my hair eventually falls out, someone, anyone will call me sexy.
THE INVENTION OF THE PILL IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO BELIEVE IN GOD. DISCUSS.
Again, this question satisfactorily answered itself.
DO YOU HAVE PERFECT VISION? IF SO, RACHEL LUCAS ENVIES YOU WITH THE FIRE OF A THOUSAND GALAXIES.
It’s more annoying than you think to lie under the stars on a cool summer night, gazing at the moon, trying to relax, when all you can really see, is that stupid flag “Buzz” put up crooked.
FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS?
I could not think of an answer that was intellectually honest and not graphically sexual. I apologize in advance.
WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS?
Where I live, it is not yet legal to punch retarded people/hippies, yet, thus the only civilized thing to do is act like you are at a wedding at throw popcorn over your head, and maybe some soda.
LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED THAT MADE YOU GET ON YOUR KNEES AFTERWARDS AND BEG GOD TO GIVE YOU THE LAST TWO HOURS OF YOUR LIFE BACK?
Happy Feet.
DO YOU EVER PUT CLOTHES ON YOUR PETS?
My horses are more tolerant of skirts than my cow is of bras.
BEER, WINE, OR LIQUOR?
Liquor? I don’t even know her!
FALL ASLEEP OR CUDDLE?
Sleeping is for pussies and cuddling starts the spooning all over again.
FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS?
Large, bloody, screaming, still have a pulse steaks from Texas.
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DISGUSTED BY A BOOK'S ENDING THAT YOU VIOLENTLY DESTROYED THE BOOK?
Biology textbooks starting with Zebra and ending with Abiogenesis.
DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE.
Is this a ‘trick’ question? What are your motives?
TRUE OR FALSE: "REALITY" T.V. IS THE BEST REASON FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD TO HATE AMERICA.
True.
FAVORITE DRUNKEN SLATTERN: PARIS, LINDSEY, OR BRITNEY?
Anna Nicole Smith (because she’s gone home, away from my television)
MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON?
This is a trick question the minute I realized why you did not say balls.
WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP.
I fell out of a tree house 12 feet to the ground, then drank some more.
IF YOU COULD HAVE MAD SKILLZ IN DANCING OR IN SINGING, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD IT BE FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL SATISFACTION OR TO IMPRESS OTHER PEOPLE AND POSSIBLY GET SOME ACTION?
Singing, to mostly impress myself.
IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD YOU USE IT FOR GOOD OR EVIL?
Read minds, Evil.
IF YOU NEVER SEE ANOTHER Q&A MEME AGAIN, WILL IT BE TOO SOON?
I was a meme virgin until tonight. So, if you do not call me tomorrow, rot in hell.

I finally got a blog (Which will only confuse people) and did the meme but I'm wondering when you're gonna do it?

Ok, thanks for that. I had to create an account just so I could answer your survey. Lovely

WHAT INSULTING NICKNAMES WERE YOU CALLED IN CHILDHOOD? jennfro I had big hair too

WHEN YOU CRY, DO YOU LOOK UGLY, OR DOES IT GIVE YOU A BEAUTIFUL SAD GLOW? Ugly and juicy. It's amazing how much snot can be produced

ARE YOU FORGETTING HOW TO WRITE BECAUSE YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTER? Yes, if by a weird chance I pick up a writing utensil my hands cramps up and creates completely illegible scratches.

DO YOU THINK VEGETARIANS ARE INSANE? (BECAUSE THEY ARE.) If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made of meat?

DO YOU LIKE KIDS? IF SO, WHY? WHY, IN THE NAME OF GOD? I don't like children. I have one. I love him. And I feel really sorry for him that I can't stand for him to bring home his sticky annoying friends. I can't stand their parents either because their entire lives revolve around their sticky offspring.

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WOULD YOU LICK YOURSELF JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD? DON'T TRY TO DENY IT. Of course. Especially in public

ARE YOU AS FRIGHTENED OF CLOWNS AS YOU SHOULD BE IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU? Is there any sane reason for an adult to put on a ton of makeup and bright colored clothing for other people's entertainment? Well other than the wife of a televangelist.

IF YOU COULD BE EITHER VERY BEAUTIFUL OR VERY SMART, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY? Smart, definitely. Beauty is temporary. With intelligence I can laugh at those people when it's all over for them.

HOW MUCH MONEY WOULD YOU REQUIRE TO HAVE INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH MICHAEL MOORE OR ROSIE O'DONNELL (DEPENDING ON YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCE BUT DOES THAT REALLY MATTER WITH THESE TWO)? There is not enough money in the world. My sexual preference is that I prefer the non-grotesque

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CUSS WORD? Currently it's bastard. Such an archaic term that really should apply to dead beat dads rather than their spawn, no matter how sticky

IF YOU'RE A MAN, HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT YOUR JUNK IN YOUR ZIPPER? HOW BAD DID IT HURT? IF YOU'RE A WOMAN, HOW GLAD ARE YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT A MAN? So amazingly glad. I like having all of my internal organs on the inside of my body. It's really not that important to me to be able to write my name in the snow. But I know they are proud, so I won't burst their bubbles

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO GROW OLD OR DIE TRAGICALLY YOUNG? Tragically old and well preserved

DESCRIBE YOUR MOST RECENT NIGHTMARE. I don't remember. But during last night's storm I dreamed that lightening stuck the dryer in my driveway (it's being removed this week) and made it start running. I think driveway laundry is pretty scary

DO YOU WISH THAT, INSTEAD OF PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION DEBATES, THEY INSTEAD HAD TO BOX EACH OTHER, BECAUSE THEN THERE'D NEVER EVER BE ANOTHER DEMOCRAT IN THE WHITE HOUSE? Only in my best dreams Rachel. That would be a wonderful day. I would be tempted to dance and sing in the streets and present you with a lollipop and fabulous shoes

ABBA: THE BLONDE OR THE BRUNETTE? Brunette, totally

WHAT DISEASE DO YOU MOST FEAR CONTRACTING? alzheimer's

WHO DO YOU MISS THE LEAST? Everyone from high school. That's the real reason I missed reunion

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE SHOPPING FOR NEW CLOTHES (10 BEING SO MUCH YOU'D RATHER CLEAN THE CAT BOX WITH YOUR BARE HANDS). Depends, am I shopping with my money or some elses

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE BEFORE THE LAST TIME YOU THREW UP? Eat? No, it was just a lot of beer and vodka

NAME FIVE "CLASSIC" POPULAR SONGS YOU HOPE YOU NEVER HEAR AGAIN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE. there is nothing new, this is just a lost cause. It would just be depressing to put it into writing just to realize that the Black Eyed Peas have already re-released it

IF YOU WERE A DOG, WHICH BREED WOULD YOU BE? Rott, absolutely

FAVORITE BODILY FUNCTION? (COUGH, SNEEZE, BELCH, POOP, FART, YAWN, ETC) Yawn, because then everyone else has to yawn too.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU HAD A HUGE FIGHT WITH, WHAT WAS THE FIGHT ABOUT, AND WHO WON? My mother. Does it matter, it's always the same. In her fantasy world she is never wrong and always wins.

AS WE ALL KNOW, PRO FOOTBALL IS THE ONLY SPORT WORTH CARING ABOUT. IN LIGHT OF THAT FACT, WHO IS THE BEST NFL QUARTERBACK OF THE LAST 10 YEARS? BEST RUNNING BACK? BEST WIDE RECEIVER? BEST DEFENSIVE PLAYER? BIGGEST PRIMA DONNA? WHINIEST BITCH? I know nothing about football. So here is my uneducated opinion. Michael Vick needs to be coated in BBQ sauce, hog tied and put in a cage with his dogs. And it's a sad day for journalism that Deon Sanders has his own column. I don't really care if I misspelled his name.

BALD MEN ARE VERY SEXY. DISCUSS. So very hot. You have to have testosterone to go bald. No pansy metro sexuals there. If that's not enough, Bruce Willis. Enough said

THE INVENTION OF THE PILL IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO BELIEVE IN GOD. DISCUSS. Amen

DO YOU HAVE PERFECT VISION? IF SO, RACHEL LUCAS ENVIES YOU WITH THE FIRE OF A THOUSAND GALAXIES. I do, so sorry Rachel

FOOD YOU FIND SO REPUGNANT THAT YOU SIMPLY CANNOT BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE PUT IT IN THEIR MOUTHS? Fois Gras

WHEN YOU GO TO THE MOVIES AND THE JERK BEHIND YOU KICKS YOUR SEAT CONSTANTLY, DO YOU IGNORE/MOVE OR DO YOU CHALLENGE THEM TO FISTICUFFS? Fisticuffs

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED THAT MADE YOU GET ON YOUR KNEES AFTERWARDS AND BEG GOD TO GIVE YOU THE LAST TWO HOURS OF YOUR LIFE BACK? Ultraviolet

DO YOU EVER PUT CLOTHES ON YOUR PETS? Yes, and then I take pictures

BEER, WINE, OR LIQUOR? All of the above, but not in the same glass

FALL ASLEEP OR CUDDLE? Both

FAVORITE FOOD THAT YOU KNOW WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY BUT YOU DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO FREAKING DELICIOUS? Cheetos!!

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DISGUSTED BY A BOOK'S ENDING THAT YOU VIOLENTLY DESTROYED THE BOOK? No, I'm such a nerd that I hold books in some kind of freaky reverence

DO YOU HAVE P0RN ON YOUR COMPUTER? DON'T LIE. Yep, sure do and I'm not sharing

TRUE OR FALSE: "REALITY" T.V. IS THE BEST REASON FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD TO HATE AMERICA. Absolutely true

FAVORITE DRUNKEN SLATTERN: PARIS, LINDSEY, OR BRITNEY? Britney because she fell so far

MOST DESERVING OF CHUCK-NORRIS-STYLE ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE THROAT: AL GORE OR JESSE JACKSON? Al Gore because the Chuck Norris kick would be felt by all those that love him

WHAT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT DRUNK? 'FESS UP. I forgot

IF YOU COULD HAVE MAD SKILLZ IN DANCING OR IN SINGING, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD IT BE FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL SATISFACTION OR TO IMPRESS OTHER PEOPLE AND POSSIBLY GET SOME ACTION? Dancing. Dancers have seriously hot legs. And yeah, that's for me. I check myself out in the mirror

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WOULD YOU USE IT FOR GOOD OR EVIL? Psychokinesis, both

IF YOU NEVER SEE ANOTHER Q&A MEME AGAIN, WILL IT BE TOO SOON? Yes!!